Friday, 30 August 2013

Age Is Just A Number

FYC: "Age Is Just A Number" - Roman Polanski's erotic slapstick courtroom dramedy in which a Hindu priest prosecuted for child molestation uses the Rig Veda to come to his defence, arguing that although his victim appeared to be 8 years old, once reincarnation was taken into account she was actually several millennia above the age of consent. Also starring Vin Diesel as the bemused judge's gavel-block.

Wednesday, 21 August 2013

My Heart Will Go Off

FYC: "My Heart Will Go Off" - Documentary about Switzerland's White Shroud Line euthanasia cruise ships which give their terminally diseased wealthy clients a luxurious and historically accurate recreation of the voyage of the infamous Titanic.

Wednesday, 7 August 2013

Richard Branson's Flaming Cosmic Karaoke

FYC: "Richard Branson's Flaming Cosmic Karaoke" - Documentary by Werner Herzog about the ill-fated inaugural passenger flight of Virgin Galactic, in which Sir Richard Branson accidentally strayed in an unstable orbit after a suborbital fuel explosion. The world listened live in horror over the internet as Branson repeatedly sang a vocal rendition of Tubular Bells whilst his orbit slowly decayed into an ever more fiery death.

Sunday, 4 August 2013

2001 - A Peckham Odyssey

FYC: "2001 - A Peckham Odyssey" - Kenneth Anger's swan-song was also his most bizarre and excrutiating film to date. The film consists of Kubrick's 2001 - A Space Odyssey with all the dialog replaced with random lines from the Christmas finale of much-loved early 90s low budget British 'race' sitcom Desmond's.

Saturday, 3 August 2013

How It Crumbles

FYC: "How It Crumbles" - Thriller in the vein of The Parallax View starring Vin Diesel as an intrepid New York Post journalist, Francois "Frank" Le Sida, who discovers that American consumer financial sentiment, and therefore the entire economy of the world, is being manipulated by a sinister Taiwanese baking consortium through its selection of semi-coherent messages in fortune cookies. Can Frank survive kung-fu proficient corporate press-officers and a gas chamber flooded with a vaguely unpleasant sort-of vanilla essence? Also starring Vin Diesel as a rice cooker.